I'm coming home. A different home.

Times have changed. I need to change. Adapt. Evolve. This is happenning, right now, there's no stopping it. So, like it is hurtling toward me, I shall throw myself into it. I just hope I don't come out too broken and burnt to carry on.

I think I'll be fine, though. I have you, don't I? All of you or at least some of you. So let's do this together. Let's stop the meteors and undo the plans of the universe for us. We've been beaten before yet here we stand proud and united. There is nothing the galaxy or the gods can throw at us that we haven't weathered before. Matters of the heart, the home, the past, the present, the future.

You know this; individually we are strong, together we are unstoppable. We are capable of so many great things that the future fears us.

I know what you're going to say to me. "It's too soon." No. It's not. It's never too soon for this because we'll only realise all we've missed when it's too late.

Be it of money, sex, love, drugs, disco, alcohol, friends and peers. Of the flowers, the candy, the photographs, the good times, the bad, the memories, the bands and the songs. Or even of words, eyes, mouths, fingers, laughs or tears. We can do this.

So come with me. Get in the yellow car.

The plush orgy.

When people spend way too much time in the office they start to get a bit loopy. When the office collectibles start having sex, wild three way sex nonetheless, you know you're starting to lose it. Whatever little of it you had anyway.

Footloose and Fancy Free.

There are few things in this world that truly scare me. Fish and old people aside though, the next thing on that list would be seeing my father do the booty bump with a belly dancer. So how i managed to snap this horrible photo, disregarding my cat-like reflexes for now of course, was that my dad's friends thought it'd be funny to present him with a belly dancer for his 60th. I did not think this so amusing. From the moment she slithered out from under the table while my unknowing father was cutting his cake, i knew this couldn't end well. So he danced. And he spilt beer on her. Accidentally. Duh. It wasn't a wet.. Belly dancing costume top contest. It was a birthday party. Then suddenly, my mom, 'Hot Babe' Chan danced with her. Then all my aunts. I proceeded to drop to the floor in seizures, foaming at the mouth. The memory is too traumatising. I stop here.

Tht. Right there.

You see that thing. In her hair. Right there. Tht's ling's version of a hair clip. It is actually a paper clip. I work with kooks.

She's not that big.

People always say that she, my cat, is the biggest they've ever seen. Well, look at Hassi's cats. They're like mini-tigers. So i took a photo of Tabby comparing her to a pack of smokes. She's not that big.

Steamed what?

So apparently you can steam an egg. I find the notion absolutely ridiculous.

Soon.

One day baby, we'll be together. My darling Beemer 645Ci. <3